Fuck You Cookies
February 22nd, 2010|Filed Under Dessert, Recipes

Chocolate and Pecan Cookies 600x450 Fuck You CookiesNothing says, “Hi, I hate your guts” like these cookies. They look beautiful, are perfectly cooked, sweet, crispy and taste like shit. I love giving these to people I hate. Sometimes I bring in a batch to work and leave them in the kitchen.

I was hosting a party a few years ago that got out of control. My friend Liria decided to take the gifts my roommate had bought for her family and handed them out to my guests as if she had bought them herself. I had to go to each person and take the gift back and put it back under the tree. My guests were not happy. After the huge commotion, I heard a loud knock on my door. I open it and it’s my next-door neighbor. She said we were being too loud. I just slammed the door in her face; I mean it was a Saturday night.

The next day, I kind of felt bad about slamming the door on my neighbor. I decided to make her some cookies. Well, to be honest I made myself cookies first and decided to make her a few, but her batch had a few extra tablespoons of salt. I knocked on the door and I said “Hi, sorry for last night, I got carried away”. She was so nice and I was kind of feeling bad holding these cookies in my hand. She took the plate and then started lecturing me about respecting my neighbors. She expressed that I should recycle, not slam my door, not blast rap music, this bitch was out of control. All of a sudden, the guilt started to disappear and I smiled from ear to ear as she continued with her lecture. She slammed the door in my face right before I could tell her that I can hear her farting in the bathroom through the window. Oh well. Bon appetite.

These cookies are amazing. If you like the person make the recipe below, if you hate them, make the Fuck You version and just add 3 Tablespoons of salt.

Not seen on Goop

Recipe: http://www.mysocialchef.com/2010/02/fk-you-cookies/


  • 1 Stick Unsalted Butter – Left at room temperature for 2 hours
  • 1/2 Cup Sugar
  • 1/2 Cup Light Brown Sugar
  • 1/2 Teaspoon Vanilla
  • 1 Egg
  • 1 Cup Flour
  • 1/4 Cup Pecans – Finely Chopped
  • 1/2 Cup Chocolate Chips
  • 1/2 Cup White Chocolate Chips
  • Pinch of Salt


  1. Take the butter and sugar and whisk in a bowl for about two minutes. Make sure it’s smooth and fluffy. Next and the flour and whisk for a 1 minute. Finally, fold in all the other ingredients with a spatula, cover and refrigerate for 1 hour.
  2. Preheat your oven to 350 and cover a cookie sheet with wax paper. Using a teaspoon measure out pieces of dough and quickly roll them into a ball in your hand and place on the wax paper about 2 inches apart. Cook for 10-11 minutes, until lightly golden brown, let it cool for 10 minutes; then remove and repeat until you are finished with the dough.

Number of servings (yield): 12

Meal type: dessert

Fuck You Cookies

11 Responses to “Fuck You Cookies”

  1. berti says:

    Hahahahahahah… I love it

  2. Lily G says:


  3. Mile says:

    Wow! I have some family members I can make these for..cant wait!! thanks..

  4. Your Neighbor says:

    I am having for high blood pressure when you gave it me cookie

  5. Paige says:

    your such a sick mo*fo I LOVE THAT I need that gene implanted I don’t think I got the ‘f** you gene’ I’m definitely trying these maybe it’ll spark something…..

  6. Milena says:

    I love it!!! I am cracking up at work :)
    You are the coolest Petrit.

  7. Sibyl Scisco says:

    Cool Blog Post. Thanks for sharing.

  8. Heavenly housewife says:

    LOL I like you :)

  9. Beth M says:

    Hahahah, that was one of the best stories ever. I hope you made the FU cookies for the girl that handed out your gifts too.

    If only there was a way to ensure that the receiver knew that you made them disgusting on purpose rather than just being a bad cook.

  10. christellar says:

    kind of a wastet of pecans; no?

  11. Daniel says:

    LOL – sicklarious! The recipe entries are 2funny…like to read the background stories that inspired them – I smell a nyTimes best seller; whent that happens I want to be treated with “L**E YOU” cookies w/ a touch of W.

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