Stupid Chocolate Cake w/ Mascarpone & Marshmallow Frosting
August 16th, 2010|Filed Under Dessert, Recipes

Chocolate Cake 600x450 Stupid Chocolate Cake w/ Mascarpone & Marshmallow FrostingNo no, the cake is not stupid. Seriously, I’m not trying to say anything bad about cakes. I think people who bake are stupid. How can you lock yourself in a kitchen, cook, wait, cook, wait, cook and wait all day long?  It’s the most ridiculous thing ever. Whenever someone tells me they’ve baked something from scratch two things go through my head. First, I think they must have absolutely nothing better to do with their time and that they are gay.

It’s just not worth it. Who has the time to measure, weigh, mix, beat, fold, grease, pour, preheat, bake, rotate, cool, rack, cut, melt, whip, fold, seal, frost, chill and serve? Not me. Maybe you do, but I got bills to pay and people to see.

The best cakes are the ones you buy in a box. Everything is perfect, just follow the instructions and you have a “just fine” cake. Spend your time and energy on things that matter, like the frosting. Have you ever heard anyone comment on the cake before commenting on the frosting? The cake is your canvas and the frosting is your paint. Don’t be stupid and spend time trying to make your own cake. Seriously, no one gives a shit. It’s all about the frosting.

I made 5 different cakes and spent about $200 on different sized pans and chocolate. A friend gave me a French recipe for a basic nice, dark, moist, dense chocolate cake. Since the original author is French and has universal healthcare I’m not going to give her credit, she already has more in life than I ever will. I made a few revisions to it, but the cake is perfect to hold a nice frosting. Use this if you must.

Chocolate Cake

( use a scale, see the French are stupid)

- 200 gr butter

- 200 gr dark chocolate

- 250 gr sugar

- 5 eggs

- 2 tablespoons of flour

- 1 Teaspoon Vanilla

Pre-heat your oven to 180°C (350°F). Line an 8-inch round cake pan with parchment paper (no need to if you’re using a non-stick pan).

Melt together the butter with the chocolate (in a double-boiler or in the microwave slowly and for just a few seconds at a time, blending with a spoon between each pass).

Transfer into a medium mixing-bowl. Add in the sugar, stir with a wooden spoon and let cool a little. Add in the eggs one by one, mixing well after each addition. Finally, add in the flour and mix well.

Pour the dough into the pan, and put into the oven to bake for 25 to 30 minutes, until the center is set but still a little wobbly. Turn the oven off but leave the cake inside for another ten minutes, then put the pan on a cooling rack on the counter to cool completely. Cover with plastic wrap, refrigerate, and take it out about an hour before serving.

Mascarpone Cream Cheese and Marshmallow Frosting

4 Tablespoons Unsalted Butter – Room Temperature

1 Cup Powdered Sugar

2 Teaspoons Vanilla Extract

1 Cup Marshmallow Fluff

1/2 Marscpone Cheese

1 Cup Heavy Cream

Add and whisk all the ingredients, except the heavy cream, in a bowl. In a separate bowl whisk the Heavy Cream until fluffy. Fold the two together and frost your cake.

5 Responses to “Stupid Chocolate Cake w/ Mascarpone & Marshmallow Frosting”

  1. Paige says:

    oh shit i fell asleep whilst reading the ingredients THE french are only good for 2. things, 1. MAKING OUT 2 having someone to hang out with when you feel snooty and artistic

  2. Paige says:

    but the cake looks amazing, are we allowed to cuss? sorry i’m a little sassy when i’m drunk ( a little hair of the dog)

  3. David says:

    why is someone posting viagra pills on here i think this choco cake will be all you need! wow! you should have a social chef sale and make all this stuff!

  4. Jake says:

    Gotta have the vegan alternative,,,,this looks soooooooo good!!!

  5. Mimi says:

    The best chocolate cake ever! It is so moist and melts in your mouth yum! It’s extremely easy to make, so people get baking! I know I will be making it over and over…

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